Crack The Code

In class today, Sarah noted the tip of my hips as I slid from Plank Pose to enter into Chaturanga Dandansa. That tip forward and subsequent arch of my lower back had come up before and I hadn’t fully solved it. Taryn brought up the fact that my heart and body are open. My lesson is to draw in and strengthen. Sarah reinforced this metaphor of strength by encouraging me to both draw out through my heels and the crown of my head, while maintaining strength from my pubic bone to my sternum/chin. I understood the concept of push and pull, expansion and contraction. Trust me, I’d been in all the realms. This was a continual metaphor for my old life. Living in the middle was a new concept for me.

Pradeep said to me yesterday, “Take the middle road.” I took that to heart. I realized that tenderness WAS possible. Tender defined: soft or delicate in substance. Substance! What was I made of? A delicate balance. Libra defined, “Libra strives to create equilibrium in all areas of life.” That’s it! I was out of balance. Ah-hah! Cracked the code. I was in! That was how it felt yesterday when I entered into the back door of my own website. Only this time, I was entering into the back door of my Self.

I wanted to fully understand the concept, so I asked Sarah how I could maintain that strength amidst times of transition. The moment I lifted my torso into Upward-Facing Dog, my belly fell. Splat! Boom! Hello, I am here! Grrrr. The next time I took the process of transition even slower and I was able to pinpoint exactly the moment I should rise and my belly could remain strong. Relief. Achievement. Success. I had done it. Good job. Wait, now do it again. Again and again. Again. Once more. Now good. Rest. Repeat tomorrow and every other day after that.

She explained it like this: “From that place of stability, you can give seeds that can then be planted.” Her words rung through my bones. She meant that if I truly anchor down in my center, I am then able to give from a grounded place. Those seeds, given from that place, can be planted and grow. Ah. Now I get it. Cracked the code of my whole life in 24 hours. Let life begin. The true seeds will be planted.